I disappear for a month and then come back with a rant. Please forgive me!
Just because a double-standard is widely accepted by society, that doesn't make it right. People need to quit putting the burden of a man's morality on women's shoulders. As a woman who had a sexual addiction, I not once blamed any person outside of myself for the choices I made. It wasn't anyone's fault for wearing too little clothing or trying to tempt me or what-have-you. And, if I hear one more person say that men are different because they are "visually" stimulated, I'ma cut a fool. Women have pornography addictions. LOTS of women have pornography addictions. We just seem to face it head on and take responsibility instead of pointing fingers all over the place... I understand that I seem to be making a blanket statement about men that isn't fair. I am trying to make a statement about society and what we teach our boys and girls about sex, and how it affects their development. Please share your comments!!
http://givenbreath.com/2013/09/03/fyi-if-youre-a-teenage-girl/
I know it is obvious, but really? Pictures of your scantily clad sons doing muscle poses on a beach...
However, even without the pictures, the article dances dangerously close to the line of "men are
meatheads with no self control" and "women are evil temptresses so no man is guilty in his own discretions"...
I would also like to submit for thought: If all advertising and media which depicted women as objects
was instantly replaced with similar images of men, how long would it take for our minds to adjust and for women to begin to be "visual". How differently would we view men if they were marketed to the general public in the way that women are: unabashedly and aggressively. We eat fake meat and plastic cheese on a nutrient void piece of "bread", because of marketing. Women want certain clothes, and colors, and couches, simply because of marketing. Spend 10 minutes on a woman's Pinterest page and you can find her every visual preference and desire. How can it be said that we aren't visual? We are obviously very visual, it's just that society isn't trying to sell us men.
Just because a double-standard is widely accepted by society, that doesn't make it right. People need to quit putting the burden of a man's morality on women's shoulders. As a woman who had a sexual addiction, I not once blamed any person outside of myself for the choices I made. It wasn't anyone's fault for wearing too little clothing or trying to tempt me or what-have-you. And, if I hear one more person say that men are different because they are "visually" stimulated, I'ma cut a fool. Women have pornography addictions. LOTS of women have pornography addictions. We just seem to face it head on and take responsibility instead of pointing fingers all over the place... I understand that I seem to be making a blanket statement about men that isn't fair. I am trying to make a statement about society and what we teach our boys and girls about sex, and how it affects their development. Please share your comments!!
http://givenbreath.com/2013/09/03/fyi-if-youre-a-teenage-girl/
I know it is obvious, but really? Pictures of your scantily clad sons doing muscle poses on a beach...
However, even without the pictures, the article dances dangerously close to the line of "men are
meatheads with no self control" and "women are evil temptresses so no man is guilty in his own discretions"...
I would also like to submit for thought: If all advertising and media which depicted women as objects
was instantly replaced with similar images of men, how long would it take for our minds to adjust and for women to begin to be "visual". How differently would we view men if they were marketed to the general public in the way that women are: unabashedly and aggressively. We eat fake meat and plastic cheese on a nutrient void piece of "bread", because of marketing. Women want certain clothes, and colors, and couches, simply because of marketing. Spend 10 minutes on a woman's Pinterest page and you can find her every visual preference and desire. How can it be said that we aren't visual? We are obviously very visual, it's just that society isn't trying to sell us men.
True that!
ReplyDeleteI think many women are in denial. They don't want to think they can be classified in the same category as men. Everyone is visual, and women are totally marketed to with men.
ReplyDeleteHere's an example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23wbRufct-o
Sure, it's funny, but one look at the comments shows that the ad hit where they wanted it to. "Forget the mac and cheese i want him,
he can stand behind me while i stir the pot.
Get that liquid gold baby."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLqci6rTi6Q- This one is also funny, but shirtless by the end of it. And someone in the comments even says "Ladies FINALLY have some eye candy to look at in commercials too. Guys have been seeing half naked girls in commercials for years. Bout time we got our turn ;)"
Also, Magic Mike and 50 Shades of Gray.
How many teenage girls spend free time ogling "heart throbs" in Teen Bop? I know I did, and it was socially acceptable in every way. Yet, if a boy were doing the same thing, even though the pictures are usually innocent with all their clothes on (well, they were when I was a kid), it would be totally different. It's not. It's so bizarre to me that this myth that men are visual while women are not has been perpetuated for so long.
Yes
ReplyDeleteMen marketed as sexual objects unabashedly and aggressively? That day is here! Can't remember what the product was- dressing maybe? But the image of a very attractive, very nude man laying on a table with only a cloth napkin barely obstructing the view is quite clear in my memory. What do women gain from this "leveling the field"? I can't come up with any benefit, only a further deterioration of our society.
ReplyDeleteYou are definitely right that "leveling the field" would provide no benefit to society. I wasn't intending to provide it as a solution, just pointing out that the differences are fueled more by nurture than by nature and provide a flimsy excuse for poor behavior.
DeleteSaw this on FB. Someone gets it, and it isn't Ms. Hall!
ReplyDeleteFrom my wise 18 year old son: "Apparently the best way to prevent girls from being objectified is to teach them that they have to hide themselves away rather than simply telling men to respect boundaries. It's like we're shaming the people who are victims to it. That's the thing I've never understood with modesty in the church anyway. 'Women make sure not to dress this way so you don't *make* the men thing bad thoughts.' Why can't the men just not think the bad thoughts? That would more easily solve the problem without inconveniencing anyone."
Yes!! Women are totally visual! I spent the better part of my tween years addicted to pornography. So as a continually recovering addict (because although I stay far away, it will always seem alluring and tempting), I can wholeheartedly agree that the modesty issue should have nothing to do with keeping men virtuous because they have no self control and just can't help themselves!! I wish the modesty issue would turn to what it should really be about: respect for our Heavenly Father and ourselves! And it goes so much deeper than the cut and whatnot of our clothes! Modesty is character trait, not a fashion statement!
ReplyDelete